Weekend

The last two nights have been some of the craziest and most eventful of my life.  My good friend, B,  came to visit me and we had a great time.  The first night we went out for dinner at a wonderful little Italian restaurant in town.  The food was great and the company was better.  It was so nice to be able to catch up after such a long time.  We then went to a small local bar and had a few drinks to pass the time (we were waiting until 10:00 to go and watch The Hobbit at the Imax).  We got there a bit early, so the music and dancing had not started there, but we had a drink each and had more time to talk.  We then went to the house of a friend of his and the three of us went to the movie theater.

The movie was wonderful, even though it lasted until the wee hours of the morning.  It really did not feel like we were watching it for three hours.  After the movie we went back to the friend's house to retrieve our cars.  B ended up coming home with me, despite other plans, because he is allergic to his friend's five cats.  We finally got to bed around three in the morning.

Last night was an adventure as well.  We met several friends of mine from work for dinner.  It was a bit awkward, since he had not met any of them before, but I think we both had a good time.  We exchanged Christmas gifts and drew on the table cloth.  Afterwards B and I met up with his friend C.  The three of us went to karaoke.  The bar was full - we could barely find a place to sit.  It took nearly an hour for our turn at the mic to come, but once it did we tore the place down.  Well, we had fun, at least.  It was getting late by the time we finished singing, so we left shortly after.  We went back to the bar from the night before for a little extra fun.  This time we arrived at the proper time - the music was booming and the dance floor was alive with bodies.

Usually I am not much fun in places like this; I don't feel very comfortable dancing when others can see.  B tends to make me ignore my personal vices though, so I soon found myself in the middle of the dance floor.  We danced for an hour or more before the club closed.  We went out for breakfast after (thank goodness too: I needed the several cups of coffee I got there).

Other exiting things happened.  Or at least, it was fun for me.  I'll spare you all the boring details.

I guess the point of this post is to say that B went home today.  After such an eventful two nights, it feels a little strange to be at home typing on my computer.  It will be wonderful to actually get to sleep tonight, but I can't help but feel a bit lonely now.  I suppose it makes sense, but I can't seem to shake it.  Seeing what it can be like to have so much fun out with someone, I feel even more acutely aware of the fact that I don't have anyone to go out with.  I know that it will happen someday, but I do get tired of waiting.  So that's my pity party for the week.  I am lonely and it sucks.  The end. :)

Clipper Nightmares

Not those things again.  I hate them.  I HATE them.  They are loud and they feel weird against my skin.  Usually it is a lady at Mommy's work that forces me to sit still while those things tear through my beautiful long fur, but now Mommy is doing it herself.  I don't know why.  What did I do to deserve this punishment?

I do everything I can to make her stop.  I shiver and shake, I try to jump down off the table and run off, I lie down to cover the parts she is trying to clip.  However I try though, it just doesn't seem to help.  If I lay down, she picks me up.  If I try to move, she tells me to stay.  If I shake and try to crawl onto her lap she only holds me for a moment before putting me back on that dreaded table.

What's worse is, I don't think Mommy even knows what she's doing.  She takes those noisy awful clippers to me, but my fur feels weird afterwords.  It is short in some spots and longer in others.  I look silly; I just know it.  Now my legs are naked - it feels strange.  The dew on the grass is colder now in the mornings without my thick fur to protect me.  I must keep my eye on her from now on.  Perhaps I'll find someway to destroy those clippers so she cannot use them again. . .

Boring Day

Mommy's so mean.  She never lets me do what I want.  Today I saw a really neat green ribbon sitting up on the table next to the couch.  Naturally I tried to climb up to claim this beautiful toy, but Mommy saw and yelled at me!  It's no fair!  She did the same thing when I tried to play with some paper from there.
That table always has the best toys on it.  I don't know why she won't let me climb on it.  Maybe if I just keep trying she'll realize how important it is to me.

Also, my Pappaw is gone today.  He left really early to play "golf" or something.  I'm not sure what that is, but I think it involves playing with a ball all day.  I can't believe he didn't take me with him.  I am GOOD at playing with balls.  I guess I'll just lay by the glass door and wait for him to come home.  Maybe then he'll throw some balls for me.

Summer Fun

I had a great two weeks with my sister.  She was in town (visiting from Oklahoma) to get a Missouri driver's ed course under her belt.  She was a little green, but she learned quickly.  Guess who got to take her around to practice driving in between lessons?  If you guessed me you win. . .  respect?  It was a little nerve-wracking to be honest.  I'm pretty fond of my car.  It takes me places I want to go.  I was a little nervous to have a new driver behind the wheel.  We managed to make it through in one piece, though!

I haven't been up to much other than that the past few weeks.  We went swimming a couple of times, which is always fun.  I worked on my underwater handstand.  I still have terrible balance, but it's a little easier underwater.  I actually got to the point where I could hold it for 10 seconds or so. . . occasionally.

I've started roleplaying again.  I didn't really realize how much I missed it.  I know I'll burn myself out again soon, but I'll enjoy it while it lasts.  It doesn't help that I have to write a 50,000 word story in 10 days for one of my Pokémon websites.  It's a huge task, and I hope I can get it done in time.  Wish me luck!  

Almost There

Ah, finally almost finished with my summer online course.  I go in to take the final today.  Once I take that and finish the revisions for our final essay I will be done!  I have to admit, I have mixed feelings about it.  On one hand I'm excited to have extra free time for a few weeks until fall classes start.  On the other hand, I was really enjoying some of the writing exercises and resources that the teacher was giving us.

Since the class will be ending, I no longer have to post daily (well, almost daily) blog entries.  I would still like to keep this open though, as a way to journal and play with different writing ideas.  I can't promise that updates will be regular any more, but I think we will still have fun.  If anyone has any fun writing prompts to share with me, please post and let me know!  In the meantime, I'll get back to you all later.  I've got an exciting day of swimming and test-taking ahead of me.

Reflection

                This blogging experience was both new and exciting for me.  I had tried blogging in the past, but I had never been able to keep up any consistency with it.  I certainly hadn’t tried one for just writing exercises.  It was a lot of fun to be able to try new prompts each day.  I did come across a few bumps along the road, but overall the experience was a good one.

                The biggest problem that I ran into was remembering to keep up with the daily schedule.  I would often get busy in my day-to-day life and forget that I needed to write for my blog.  I would remember, of course, the next morning when it was too late to post anything.  I also had difficulty finding subjects that I wanted to write about.  There were several prompt ideas available through the links we were given, but it was difficult to find ones that sounded entertaining.

                Despite that, I was very happy when I did find fun or exciting prompts.  I loved being able to describe situations or explore new stories.  One of my favorite prompt types would say to start out a story with a certain word or phrase, or incorporate certain words into the story.  It was amazing to see what could be shaped from a few simple words. 

On days where my life was more exciting I even used the blog as a sort of journal, which was great.  It was a fun way to share what was going on in my life.  I have always loved the thought of recording important events; I keep several journals in different spots for whenever I feel like writing.  I would like to continue this, but expand it onto an online journal as well.  I would obviously keep my more private thoughts in my paper journals, but blogging could be a great way to share stories.

Overall, I really did enjoy this assignment.  I regret that I was not able to keep up with it as consistently as I should have.  I can’t help but wonder what I might have written on those lost days.  I hope to continue this blog in the days to come.  I hope that through continuous writing exercises I can grow in ways that have thus far eluded me.

Freewriting

I like spending time here at the book store.  The adjoining coffee shop is a little loud, but the people are all so nice that it doesn't matter.  I always know that I'll share one interest with anyone here: reading.  It is that same feeling of community that draws me to anime conventions (like the one I'm going to this weekend) or the ukulele conference.  I love feeling that I belong.  I love feeling like I don't have to worry about fitting in, because everyone around me is already a friend.

I used that word again.  "Worry".  Perhaps I do use it too often.  I cannot help it sometimes, though.  It is in my nature to worry, to stress, to be tense and uncomfortable.  I try to work on being more comfortable around people, but sometimes it is just too hard to change.  Even if I could change, would I want to?  It has become a part of who I am.  It is part of what makes me make the choices that I do.  If I didn't worry and over-analyze things, I would be a whole different person, right?

Perhaps I do need to make more of an effort to communicate with people, though.  Too often I find myself out in public, alone and uncomfortable.  I have no problem with passing conversation.  I can be pleasant to strangers around me with no difficulty.  I have absolutely no idea how to hold a real conversation, though.  It's part of the reason that I have trouble making new friends.  We have fun together and enjoy each others' company, but then the silence inevitably comes.  I don't mind the silence, myself.  I can tell that other people find it uncomfortable, though. 

The worst part is, I have no idea how to end it.  The more I think about how silent it is, the more my mind goes blank.  I search in vain for a subject to talk about, my my head just says "nope".  And that's that.  Not having anything to talk about just makes me more nervous, and it becomes a vicious cycle.  Am I the only one that feels this way?  Why is it so hard to do something that should be so natural?  I have no idea.  The only thing I can think to do is continue pushing myself out of my comfort zone and hope that eventually something clicks.